17 March 2013

Facebook is a Snitch!

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Why does Facebook tell on me every time I do something?

I just noticed my ‘recent activity’ and it said "Rhonda Louise just pinned a whole load of crap."

Ok, well maybe not those exact words, but near enough. It might just as well have said "Rhonda Louise is pissing around trying to figure out what the freak Pinterest is all about and getting squatsville – she is clearly too thick to understand the simple concept of the drawing pin."

Facebook is also telling people that I started reading The Silver Linings Playbook in 1992 and I haven’t finished it yet. But it kindly notes that I have ‘made progress’. Don’t patronise me Faceboook!

And get your facts right before you defame me. As a matter of fact I read it, I finished it and I just didn’t tell you. You didn't know that did you, smarty pants? I don’t actually tell you every single thing that I do Facebook. I don’t post “Rhonda Louise just broke a nail, took a leak and had a meltdown at her husband.”

And you know something I realised Facebook? You are just GUESSING! You are guessing what you think should be reported. Rhonda Louise wrote something sparklingly clever and witty? Nah not interested. Rhonda Louise replied to someone’s post with a gut wrenchingly twee “LOL” and to make it worse added a smiley face? Yep, perfect, post it.
I am definitely not notifying this blog on Facebook.

And anyone reading this, please don’t tell Facebook.

It will just get jealous and who knows what revenge it will exact. I expect it would send out friend requests on my behalf to every single member of the mormon seniors’ trainspotters page.

On second thoughts, maybe I should think this one through ...



  1. Hi,
    Visiting from Bloppy Bloggers - I'm new there so am just now realizing that all you cool kids post links to your recent posts. Which is SO cool. And now that I'm here, I realize how cool your blog is, too. Glad I found it. Facebook told my work on me the other day. I did a "share" but didn't realize I was still logged in as admin for my work's page. Yeah, it took one of the sales guys saying "I think somebody hacked our Facebook page because there's something really weird up there" for me to figure it out. Facebook is SUCH a snitch. Trying to out my bloggie me to workie me.
    And wait - am I supposed to put a smilie but not an LOL? Or are both out now?

  2. LOL :)
    I'm glad someone else has recognised Facebook's evil tendencies.
    Thanks for stopping by Kristi.
    See you on the Bloppy side.

  3. LOL - this was hysterical...and you're right. Facebook is like a bad combination of Big Brother, the cool kid at the lunch table, and that dudley Do right Christian who judges you. :)

    1. Do you think that Mark Zuckerberg has programmed Facebook with his own personality???